Monday, December 05, 2005

 

Iraqi VP: Bush Big Liar

YOU CANT TRUST THE IRAQIS YOU GIVE YOU AN ACCURATE SENSE OF WHATS GOING ON THERE TOO CLOSE TO THE SITUATION TO SEE THE FOREST FOR THE TREES FOR CHRISSAKES ITS A DESSERT OUT THERE
Merkin Patriot | 12.05.05 - 12:40 pm | #
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SORRY THATS "TO GIVE YOU" NOT "YOU GIVE YOU"
Merkin Patriot | 12.05.05 - 12:40 pm | #

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I read today somewhere that a historian is saying that Bush is the worst president in the history of the USA.

HA HA HA HA THATS LIBERAL ACADEMIC BIASS FOR YOU - YOU CANT JUDGE BEST OR WORST UNTIL ITS ALL OVER - THE USA ISNT DEAD YET
Merkin Patriot | 12.05.05 - 12:53 pm | #

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Shystee Interviews Sam Hamm

THE COMMIE HOLLYWEIRD LIBERASL ARE ALL SO BUSY HAITING OUR TROOPS BY DEPICTING THEM AS ZOMBIES WHY DONT TEHY BUY A MANGET OR AN ANTENNA FLAG AND SHOW SOME SUPPORT???? LOOSERS
Merkin Patriot | 12.05.05 - 12:19 pm | #

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i don't know whetehr it'll ever air over here in Britain.

THEY WOULD HAVE TO ADOPT IT FOR BRITTISH AUDENCES WHO WONT KNOW WHO KARL ROVE IS OR WHY THE ZOMBIE WAS KILLING HIM WITH A TURKEY INSTEAD YOUD HAVE JACK STRAW GETTING HAMMERED WITH A LEG OF LAMB COVERED IN MINST SAUCE BY A SQUADDIE TOO CONFUSING
Merkin Patriot | 12.05.05 - 12:23 pm | #

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MY FAVORITE ZOMBIE MOVIE WAS WHEN SLIVESTER STALLONE DIED AND RETURNED TO VIENTAM TO AVENGE THE WAR DELIVERING LINES LIKE YOUR DEAD BUT NOT REALLY DEAD IS NOT EASY THAT WAS A HELL OF AN ACTING JOB AND ANYHOW HE FINALLY WON VIENTAM FOR US AND BROKE THE THAI BY SHOOTING THE COMMIES WITH EXPLODING ARROWS OF JUSTICE AND THEN HE MET A NICE GIRL WITH ROUND EYES WHO GAVE HIM A JADED NECKALCE BUT THEN SHE GOT SHOT DEAD AND THAT REALLY PISSED HIM OFF SO HE SHOT A LOT MORE OF THEM ASIANS BUT YOU KNOW HOW NUMBEROUS THEY ARE THEY JUST KEEP COMING AND THEN HE GOT OUT OF THERE ALIVE - IT WAS BREATHTAKLING HE SHOULD OF GOT AN OSCAR
Merkin Patriot | 12.05.05 - 12:31 pm | #

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Automotive Innovation

YOU COMMIES WONT BE AHPPY UNTIL AMERICAN INDUSTRY LOOSES ITS EDGE AND BITES THE DUTS - REMEMBER WHAT CALVIN COOLAIDGE SAID - WHATS GOOD FOR FROD MOTORS IS GOOD FOR AMERICA
Merkin Patriot | 12.05.05 - 11:00 am | #

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CLEARLY HTE ONLY REMEDY FOR THIS SITUATION IS ANOTHER TAX CUT BECAUSE THE RICHER A MAN GETS THE HIGHER THE AVERAGE INCOME IS WHEN HE WALKS INTO A BAR TO HAVE A BEER WITH YOU
Merkin Patriot | 12.05.05 - 11:05 am | #

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NEVER FORGET WHAT KENNEDY SAID A RISING TIDE FLOATS YOUR BOAT AND BELIVE YOU ME THAT MAN KNEW SOMETHING ABOUT FLOATING BOATS
Merkin Patriot | 12.05.05 - 11:06 am | #

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THEY KILLED DALE EVERHARDT BECAUSE HE TURNED OUT AN OFFER TO ENDORSE VIAGARA AND THATS A FACT JACKED IF YOU DONT BELIVE ME
Merkin Patriot | 12.05.05 - 11:08 am | #

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Friday, December 02, 2005

 

Stupidest Man Alive

I KNOW ONE THING ITS SAFER TO BE IN IRAQ THAN TO BE AN ABORTED BABY WEVE HAD 400 BILLION ABORTIONS SINCE BROWN V BROAD OF ED MANDATED DESECRATION IN THE SCHOOLS IN 1954 AND NOBODY CARES I MEAN JESUS IF WE HAD ALL THOSE BABIES THE CHINESE WOULD BE SHAKING IN THERE BOOTS OR WHATEVER IT IS THEY PUT ON THERE FEETS AND WED HAVE ENOUGH TROOPS TO NOT ONLY LIBERATE IRAQ BUT ALSO SHUT DOWN THE WHOLE DAMN PLACE
Merkin Patriot | 12.02.05 - 10:32 am | #

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A collection of cells is NOT a baby.

I SUPPORT THE CLUSTER OF LIFE WHY DONT YOU
Merkin Patriot | 12.02.05 - 10:35 am | #

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Hey, Merkin:

Happy Malcolm Xmas!
jac | Email | Homepage | 12.02.05 - 10:36 am | #

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THANSK JAC OFF COURSE YOU KNOW THAT PICTURE ISNT REALLY OF ME BUT IRONICALLY IT DOES LOOKS A BIT LIKE ME EXCPET INSTEAD OF A MUSTASH I HAVE A GOATEY AND IM NOT FROM SAINT LOUSI
Merkin Patriot | 12.02.05 - 10:39 am | #

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Addressed directly by the Merkin?

It's like being touched by the Noodly Appendage.


jac | Email | Homepage | 12.02.05 - 10:41 am | #

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Merkin's called me SMUTTY WEBEJONESIN.

I felt special that day.
Smitty Werbenmanjensen | Email | Homepage | 12.02.05 - 10:43 am | #

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Thursday, December 01, 2005

 

Freedom

I DONT BELIEVE THE ALLEGATIONS AGAINST BILL ORAILLY NO SIREE HE IS AN INDEEPENDANT VOICE AND WE NEED A STEADY VOICE IN SHAKEY TIMES YOU NEED A MAN LIKE HIM WHOSE ON TOP OF THINGS AND IS NOT AFRAID TO TAKE ONE FOR THE TEAM AND YOU KNOW HE WONT SIT ON A STORY BECAUSE HES IN TOUCH WITH THE INSIDE BUZZ IN WASHINGTON AND ISNT AFRAID TO SHARE IT WITH THE FOLKS

HES A VICTIM OF THE LIBERAL SMEAR WEB SITES AND EVERYONE ELSE WHO HAS ACCESS TO A TRANSCRIPT OR COURT RECORDS
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 5:12 pm | #

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IM ALSO GRATEFULL THAT O'RAILLY IS ON TOP OF THE ASSUALT ON CHRISTMAS STORY - NO ONE ELSE IS WILLING TO STICK HIS NECK OUT FOR HTE BABY JESUS

ITS MERRY CHRISTMAS DAMMIT NOT HAPPY HOLIDAYS OR HAPPY KAWABANGA OR MALCOM XMAS OR ANY OTHER DAY OKAY ILL CUT CHANUCKA SOME SLACK BUT THATS BECAUSE JESUS WAS FOR BEING JEWISH BEFORE HE FIGURED OUT THAT HE WAS ONTO SOMETHING NEW
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 5:18 pm | #

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FUCK BUSH!
Jen | Email | 12.01.05 - 5:35 pm | #

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HI JEN HOW ARE YOU IM A BUSH VOTER ALONE IN A SEA OF LOOSERS HERE AS YOU CAN TELL NIM IS ONE OF THE NICE ONES BUT HE STOLE MY HAM HOCK AND WHO KNOWS WHAT ELSE IF YOU GAVE HIM TEH CHANCE I WOULD OF GONE TO COMMIECON BUT IM TAKEN SO THAT POINT IS MUTE
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 5:36 pm | #

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Oh man, a personalized Merkin welcome.

That's like...W coming over for dinner.
Nim, ham hock of liberty | Email | 12.01.05 - 5:38 pm | #

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Are you still seeing the gay guy from the CD store that invited you over to peruse his collection?

I DIDNT REALLY GET A GOOD LOOK AT HIM THERE SNEAKY LIKE THAT
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 5:44 pm | #

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Watertiger has a special feet picture to put up when Merkin sends us picture of his feet.

WHAT KIND OF SPECIAL FEET PICTURE WE TALKING ABOUT
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 5:54 pm | #

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ID LIKE TO DEBAIT YOU COMMIES SOME MORE BUT IVE GOT TO GO

DONT FORGET ABOUT HTE FEETS PLEASE THINK OF THE FEETS
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 5:57 pm | #

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ITS MERRY CHRISTMAS DAMMIT NOT HAPPY HOLIDAYS OR HAPPY KAWABANGA OR MALCOM XMAS OR ANY OTHER DAY OKAY ILL CUT CHANUCKA SOME SLACK BUT THATS BECAUSE JESUS WAS FOR BEING JEWISH BEFORE HE FIGURED OUT THAT HE WAS ONTO SOMETHING NEW

Oh my god - this is the perfect greeting for inside of a Christmas card. Merkin - you could make a fortune here.
Tena | Email | Homepage | 12.01.05 - 6:27 pm | #

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"Cultural Discomfort"

THERES FREEDOM OF ASSEMBLY WHICH MEANS THAT YOU CAN GET TOGETHER WITOUT BEING BEATEN UP THATS WHY THE CONSITUTION SAYS BATTERY NOT INCLUDED AND THEN THERES A BUNCH OF PORTORICANS HANGING OUT DRINKING COFFEE ITS NOT THE SAME THING
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 1:58 pm | #

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WE SHOULDNT ENCOURAGE PORTORICANS OR ANYONE ELSE TO HANG OUT IN GROUPS IT COULD LEAD TO PEOPLE GETTING OUT OF THERE HOMES AND TURNING THE PUBLIC SQUARE INTO SOME SORT OF GATHERING PLACE WHICH IS NOT WHAT THE FOUNDING FATHERS NINTENDED

ALSO THINK OF WHAT IT WOULD DO TO CABLE TV REVENEUS
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 2:28 pm | #

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You know, if one of those Mexicans looking for white women is Gael GarcĂ­a Bernal, I could provide my address in order to help defuse racial tensions.

SEE???? ITS ALREADY STARTED

ISNT GALE BERNAL THE GUY WHO PLAYED CHE GUAYABA IN THAT MOVIE???? I THINK IT WAS CALLED MOTORCYCLE DAIRIES OR SOMETHING
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 2:47 pm | #

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EVERYONE KNOWS THE NAZSIS WERE SOCIALISTS I MEAN THEY WERE CALLED NATIONAL SOCIALISTS NEXT THING YOU KNOW YOULL SAY THAT THE PEOPLES REPUBLIC OF CHINA DONT GOT PEOPLE IN IT OR THAT THE GERMAN DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC WASNT A BIPARTISAN COUNTRY
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 3:17 pm | #

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I THINK DRINKING COFFEE OUTSIDE IS PROBABLY ILLEGAL I MEAN THOSE PORTORICANS ARE ALL DRINKING CAFE CON LECHE AND LAST TIME I CHECKED LECHERY WAS ILLEGAL IN AMERICA OR AT LEAST IT WAS IN MY AMERICA
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 3:31 pm | #

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[General discussion of Merkin continues, including (gulp!) the sad fact that no one has compiled an archive of Merkin postings (I may have to come out early with this intended Christmas present...). Vicki comments on Merkin's ability to create bold font but inability to hit the unlock caps key.]
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IF I KNEEW HOW TO MAKE A BUZZER NOISE ID MAKE IT NOW CAUSE YOUR WRONG I TYPE IN CAPS BECAUSE I BELIVE IN CAPITALISM AND THE SHIFT KEY IS FOR FLIP FLOPPERS ANYWAY LIKE JOHN SKERRY HA HA HA GET IT HES SCARY - WE DODGED A BULLET ON THAT ONE
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 3:40 pm | #

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SOUTH AMERICA IS PRETTY NICE - MY FAVORITE SOUTH AMERICAN CITY IS OLRANDO BUT ONCE YOU GET SOUTH OF THERE ITS ALL PORTORICANS
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 3:44 pm | #

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it really pisses the brazilians off, since they don't even speak spanish.

HA HA HA SOMEBODY SHOULD TELL THEM BECAUSE THEY NAMED THEIR CAPITAL RIO DE JANERO WHICH IS SPANISH FOR RIVER DE JANERO
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 3:51 pm | #

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Kipmas is Coming!

WELL OF COURSE THE WAR IN IRAQ IS PREVENTING TERORISTS FROM COMING HERE THE TERRORISTS FIGHTING OUR BOYS IN IRAQ CANT BE IN NEW YORK OR LONDON ITS A BASIC PRINCIPAL THAT AN OBJECT CANT BE IN TWO PLACES AT THE SAME TIME THATS BASIC LOGGIC IF NOT PHYSICAL REALTY WE NEED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE FACT THAT THERES A FINITE SUPPLY OF TERRORISTS AND AN INFINITE SUPPLY OF OIL AND VICE VERSA
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 1:43 pm | #

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I DONT KNOW WHY YOU LIBERASL HATE BUSH HES DONE MORE FOR AFRICA THAN ANYONE BEFORE LOOK AT COLIN POWELL AND CONDOLEASEA RICE I MEAN JUST LOOK AT THEM YOU CANT SAY HES RACEST

ALSO THE PRESIDENT IS RIGHT ABOUT ABSTINENCE IN AFRICA BECAUSE THE FEWER AFRICANS YOU GOT THE FEWER AIDS CASES YOU GOT THATS LIKE KILLING TWO BIRDS WITH ONE STONE HELL THATS PROBABLY AN AFRICAN PROVERB ANYWAY LIKE THE ONE ABOUT RAZING VILLAGES
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 1:48 pm | #

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Derb's World

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH GOING A BROAD FOR A WIFE AND THE USE OF HTE TERM "MALE ORDER BRIDE" IS NOT ONLY DESPAIRAGING ITS AN INSLUT AS WELL THAT BEING SIAD YOU GOTTA WATCH OUT FOR THE GOLD DIGGERS THEY THINK JUST BECAUSE YOUR AN AMERICAN YOU OWE THEM A LIVING OR SOMETHING
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 12:05 pm | #

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I DISAGREE WITH DERBYSHEIR ABOUT JENIFFER ANISTON HELL IF HE DOESNT THINK BREASTSS ARE GOOD AT 36 HE NEEDS TO GET HIS EYES CHECKED AT THE DOOR BECAUSE 36 IS JUST FINE BY ME I ALSO LIKE 34DD BUT THEN AGAIN IM JUST NOT DISCRIMINATING IN THAT WAY
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 12:08 pm | #

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IF JENNIFER ANNISTONS OVER TEH HILL THEN SLAP ME SILLY AND CALL ME A HILLBILLY CAUSE ILL BE COMING ROUND THE MOUNTAIN WHEN IM DONE
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 12:30 pm | #

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Fanny Ardant

DONT WORRY THEY GOT TREATMENTS FOR THAT CONDITION
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 12:37 pm | #

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FOR SOME REASON AFTER READING THIS THREAD IM HAVING A HANKERING FOR SOME BRISTOL CREAM IT MIGHT BE BECAUSE ITS THE CHRISTMAS SEASON OR MAYBE ITS BECAUSE I HAVENT HAD SOME IN A WHILE
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 12:43 pm | #

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HELL AFTER SIXTEEN KIDS YOUD HAVE WRINKLED DUGGARS TOO
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 1:01 pm | #

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I WOULD OF GONE TO COMMIECON FOR A LAUGH BUT I HAD OTHER ARRAIGNMENTS SO I GUESS NIM WAS A BENEFITTER OF MY ABSENSE TOO BAD FOR THE REST OF THE LADDIES BUT IM SPOKEN FOR ALREADY
Merkin Patriot | 12.01.05 - 1:03 pm | #

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